1. Trust her own perception of her body: as much as you find her sexy, if she feels uncomfortable with part of her body, she won’t feel sexy: typical example would be super big breasts. Most women do not like that, they have back pain from them and gravity makes them sag quickly. As much as you, her partner, are turned on by these breasts, you will go nowhere if she does not like them. The deal is breast fixed to her requirements for a participating and more willing partner, or same breast with what you have now. Your choice.
  2. Suggest that her hormones are checked: her testosterone level in particular has a great impact on whether or not she is inclined on having sex.
  3. Lower her stress level: with her more relaxed, humor and playfulness can open many doors.
  4. Pay attention to your look: I understand that you need to relax when you are home. Know though, that your appearance matters a great deal for any woman. So search for comfortable yet nice looking clothes.
  5. Make her feel special, part 1: shower and put some perfume or aftershave at night before bedtime.
  6. Make her feel special, part 2: drop blackberry, Iphone, Ipad once you go to your bedroom at night. Believe me the world will not fall apart if you are not on duty for three hours.
  7. Make her feels special, part 3: Let her talk to you about her day when you get home. Your undivided attention for ten minutes where you just listen and nod can lead you far later in the night. And please don’t try to solve her problems!
  8. Get her some help to lower her stress level in the evenings: women are not turned on by stress, and they need more time than you do to relax. And it does not happen by sitting in a sofa with a glass of wine when all is still to be done!
  9. Romance! Think back about the time you wanted to please her so she could be yours: this is what she calls romance. Pick and choose some things you did then, and do them again! If it is too far away for you to remember, imagine. Imagine what you would do facing the ideal woman of your dreams, and bring some of this into your life.


If you want to learn more about these nine rules check Why men need to do much more to have a fulfilling sex life with their wife.